Thursday, June 18, 2009

Before I even begin with Romania, let's start with current events: THE HISTORY OF THE FUTURE!

Dialogue between North Korea and the world can be briefly summarized like this:

U.S.: "You should chill man."

S. Korea: "Yeah. We don't want to fight."

N. Korea: "Never! North Korea is the greatest country in the world! Prepare to face: THE MILLION MAN ARMY!!!"

U.S.: "You're like four feet tall, you don't scare us. China? Could you help us out here? Korea won't listen."

China: "Yeah, not even I can get behind you this time, bro. Just chill out. Look, we used to be the same, all angry and bitter at the world... But then you move on. You should just build up a really bad ass economy, like we did. That's way better than missiles."

N. Korea: "I would, if it weren't for the fact that I'm the greatest mother-freaking country in the world. Why don't you just go pour a gallon of petrol up your butt and sit on a candle? We want nukes."

Britain: "Okay, now that was just uncalled for. Seriously, Kim."

N. Korea: "I am not Kim Jong Il. I am the voice of the unified Koreas!"

U.S.: "Kim is such a girl's name. IIIIIIII think it's time to freeze all your foreign assets."

N. Korea: "No! Those are the only assets I have!"

China: "And no more luxury cars for you, either."

N. Korea: "That was the one pleasure I had left! You can't do this!"

China: "I'm taking your food away from you, too. You know you can't really do anything about it."

N. Korea: "Darn you all to heck."

Romania: "Don't drop the soap, bitch."

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